Special Edition Article
9 years ago, I made a weight-loss goal.
Today, I finally hit it.
If you want to know what it really took to get here, I’ve written it out. It’s long, but I wanted to keep it real.
Here’s the saga:
When I first made the goal, it felt really attainable. It was only 10 lbs lower than my weight at the time. But life hit me like a freight train.
I had recently had emergency gallbladder surgery and I knew it was because of my stress levels. So this was my chance to try and treat my body better.
But not even a month into the goal, I found out I was pregnant with my third baby.
Her pregnancy was my hardest one and included bedrest for most of the last trimester. I gained 30 lbs. I thought I’d recover after giving birth, but then her feeding problems presented.
For the next 18 months, I fed her every 3 hours day or night. Doctors told me it was literally the only thing keeping her alive. I sacrificed my mind and body to do it and I’m grateful she made it. I also gained another 15 lbs.
January of 2020, my baby was finally growing, and I felt like maybe I’d be able to take my health back. But on March 15, 2020, I got a call from my biggest client – we’re taking all of our trainings online. Can you help us do it. The world shut down, but I didn’t.
My business grew 345% in 6 months. And I gained another 10 lbs from the stress of it all.
At my highest point, I was 60 lbs away from what once was a very attainable weight loss goal.
But, health journeys are rarely linear.
In 2021, I spent thousands of dollars with a weight loss clinic. For 5 months, we overhauled my health with an intensive regimen. This was the sum of it:
- 1:1 coaching
- Organic-only anti-inflammatory diet
- A ridiculous amount of daily herbal supplements
- Intermittent fasting 3x’s per week
- Cardio 6 days a week
- Weights 5 days a week
- Weekly massage with hypnotherapy
- Weekly Red-light sauna therapy
- Weekly oxygen and jiggle thing (still not sure what that was)
- Bi-weekly targeted laser treatment.
In those 5 months I got within 10 lbs of the goal I had made with my Doctor (which was still 20 lbs higher than the goal 9 years ago, but hey, I was trying to be realistic) and then I hit a major plateau for months. No matter what I did, my weight wouldn’t budge. Overall, I had lost 40 lbs. I wanted at least 50. They were thrilled with my progress. I was tired and frustrated. If this intensity couldn’t get me back, what could? Anything? They tried to convince me to be happy and gently told me this was probably my new normal. I didn’t like that answer.
My final health coaching session was the day we found out my mom’s cancer diagnosis. I remember telling my coach I was really worried I wouldn’t be able to keep up what we had done. She told me that I would be fine, that I knew what I needed to do, and then signed me off.
I gained 20 lbs back by my mother’s funeral. After my first semester at Harvard, I added another 7.
In the past, I have tried just about every health trend out there. I’ve done diets that took me from vegan to keto (and EVERYTHING in between). I’ve done more fitness challenges than I can count, and I’ve clocked almost 30,000 hours in my calm app. They’ve all taught me things but none of them were the magic wand they claimed to be. Thank heavens for modern medicine. I started the shot in 2024 with the goal to not be embarrassed of my Havard graduation pictures. And I was finally starting to lose weight… I also would get hit with terrible side effects every few weeks, (me and the bathroom became really good buddies) but it was worth it 😉. Even then, I got to 10 lbs away from that dang original goal and hit a plateau for over a year.
Once again, I was wondering if I should just tell myself to be happy. I weighed less than I did with the weight loss clinic and I was able to do it with consistent healthy behaviors instead of the intensive regimen we built out before.
But, look. I was trapped once again into binary thinking. “Just give up and be happy” or “Push harder.” Either do this or do that. And the problem is that “do that” was literally sending me back to my favorite over-used strength - my grit. That somehow extra effort from me was the only thing that would get me to my goal. As I’ve studied, taught, and practiced Even-Achieving, I’ve realized that only using one way to accomplish things limits us. And so, I decided to expand the range of my skills and the reach of my resources.
I found a doctor who was willing to listen better and more regularly track and adjust my meds. I joined my husband at the gym once a week to help me feel more confident in my muscle building. I made my kids help with meal planning and let simple meals “count” as dinner. I enrolled in a course by an ADHD focused nutritionist and began seeing my relationship with food in a completely different way.
All of these things stacked up not because I pushed harder but because I let other resources in to help. And that is how I crossed the finish line. I let these resources build over time and I let myself enjoy the journey. This means that my progress is both healthy and sustainable.
So, here’s my Even-Achieving way of processing it all. I’m learning more and more that big accomplishments are less about what you achieve and more about who you become in the process. I’m proud to say that through all of the ups and downs listed here, I tried to treat my body with gratitude. I knew I was asking too much of it. I’m grateful it gave me what it did. I’m also grateful for the sense of compassion it gave me for others. I know first-hand that most journeys are not linear and it’s taught me to be kinder to those going through stuff.
This timeline shows me that I was willing to sacrifice a lot for people I love. I’m ok with that. For instance, growing and keeping that sweet baby alive was something that I’m glad my body showed up for. It’s probably also why I only have 3 kids. I don’t think my body could do that again.
I’ve also now got a pretty clear map of how my body responds to stress and intensity. (This girl does love data!) In all but the last of those scenarios, I was giving my all. Giving your all isn’t sustainable. Even when I lost 40 lbs at the weight loss clinic, the program was so extremely intensive it wasn’t something I could maintain when my mom got sick.
So, seeing that coveted number on the scale without feeling deprived or exhausted is extra sweet. It’s a byproduct of what I teach and try to live with Even-Achieving. I’m consistently giving my best without sacrificing my all. I’m no longer using overextension as my favorite way to get things done. I’ve actively worked to expand the range of strategies I use to accomplish things. And it works. Even to the point that the really big goal almost became an afterthought. Almost. 😉
